Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
