So drunk its hurt
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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