I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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