you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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