I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
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