Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
