I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
