Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I looked at my own cervix.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
