Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
