even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
