just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Randomize
