just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
