He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
