why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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