So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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