What a fucking waste of an outfit
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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