I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
