Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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