Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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