Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
