U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
