I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
