Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
