I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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