Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I wish you could order shots online.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
