apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
