woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
