I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
