that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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