We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
