Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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