wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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