Whod you bang
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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