Already got asked if we're dating
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
