he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize
