went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
