is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
This couple is walking their pig around campus
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
