redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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