After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you would pick up someone in the library
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
you had me at cake vodka
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
