Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize