Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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