Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
