My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
