doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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