Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
