do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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