oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
