just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize