Say something about gay babies.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize