I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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