if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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